Human Interactions

If there is one thing I fail at, it is digesting food (or so says the local hospital). If there is another thing I  fail at, it is social interactions.

For me social interactions always go like this:

Step One: See human I would like to interact with

Step Two: I announce, "Hey Human, I would like to interact with you"

Response: Human runs away.

So I try again.

Step One: See another human that I would like to interact with

Step Two: I ask, "How are you, Human?"

Response: Human responds.

Then I get excited, thinking I am doing this interacting thing right.

Problem: I forget that I need to keep saying someone normal things.

Answer One:  I walk away mid conversation

Answer Two: I start talking about how I am afraid that ninja penguins are going to eat my pajama pants.